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Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Bread vs Stones

You must watch the video first so you have context of where this post is coming from. 

When I saw this video I thought about the times in my life when I've felt that I received stones instead of bread. It seems to me that those times come when those around you are receiving the bread you so desperately seek and you're told to wait... it's not your time yet. Or you're given a different type of bread altogether than you wanted. Especially when your desire for that particular bread is a genuinely righteous desire. 

An example in my life: being a wife and mother... or lack thereof. It's hard when it seems like everyone around you is getting married and having kids to not get impatient and jealous.

However I do firmly believe that God does have a plan for my life. He's in charge and He knows exactly what He's doing. And I'm constantly trying to remind myself that God's timetable extends into eternity. Therefore just because something doesn't happen now or in this life does NOT mean it won't ever happen. God keeps His promises. I know this. I've been promised I will be sealed to righteous man and take my place as a mother in a family. I don't know when this will happen, but I know it will happen. And when it does- I'm sure it's going to be so much better and so much harder than I ever could imagine. I can't wait!! 

P.S. You know how she talks about the "Plan A" and then "Plan K", etc. at the beginning of the video? That's totally me! If my life had gone according to my plan (created sometime in high school, or before) I'd have:
  • gone to the University of Utah
  • graduated in elementary education and become a kindergarten teacher
  • met Prince Charming summer before my senior year of college
  • gotten married to Prince Charming summer after graduating from college (I want to date at least a year before getting married... that hasn't changed over the years)
  • been a teacher for a year and then gotten pregnant
  • become a stay-at-home mom once I had my baby (I still hope to be a stay-at-home mom whenever/however I have kids)
Instead I:

  • went to Westminster College
  • majored in Psychology with dreams of becoming a therapist
  • and am now serving a Service Mission instead of marriage and diapers ;)
And although it's a different life than I imagined, I know without a doubt I'm where I'm supposed to be; doing what I need to be doing. And it's turning out to be a great life so far. I got asked once in an elevator up at Snowbird if I was happy. I answered without hesitation, Yes! And I can still answer that same question with firm resolve- YES!! Life is hard, but it is good. 

The thing that kills me is- I'm only 22! I can't wait to see how unexpectedly different life continues to turn out in the coming years. Glad to know that Heavenly Father is actively involved and directing my life. I might not always understand His will and timing, but I know it's perfect. And I know He loves me. Therefore I can trust in His will and timing.


  1. Awesome Jess. Love your attitude. I think this kind of falls into a Time and a Season for everything type thing. Like you said - Heavenly Father's timeline extends into eternity. It also reminds me of how people will often ask me, "How do you do it with your husband gone all the time?" I have told them that while of course I would prefer to have Chris home all the time, I am not going to spend 1/2 my life depressed and waiting to be happy - like if he's home is the only time I can be happy. There are many blessings and joys to be found while awaiting other blessings and joys. I also think you are making a beautiful life for yourself and I am excited to see you grow and wonder what you'll accomplish next!

  2. Great post Jess! I know that Heavenly Father has so many great plans for you. And I know that one of them is to be an example of his love for those around you, and you have done that your WHOLE LIFE! I love you so much! And a quick P.S. Did you get that quote from my Pintrest page? ;)