When O'Gwin's Come to Visit

My mom and Matt went out to Florida to help bring Stacy and her girls back out to Utah for a month. Chris came out 2 weeks later. While I've been out to see them in Florida a couple of times, not everyone in the family has. So for those who haven't- it's been about 18 months since they've seen the O'Gwin's. Needless to say... it was way past due for a visit! Here's some highlights via pictures...

Chillin' watching a movie...

...all tuckered out half an hour later.

Story time! Makai's face is hilarious by the way...

Makai enjoying the Slip & Slide

Makai, Kate, Lise, & Kylie enjoying the Kiddie Pool

Such posers in their cute swim suits! Oh, and Kylie is imitating Kate- not the other way around if anyone cares.

Sound asleep. Watching the Bachelorette finale with Grandpa, Grandma, and your aunt will do that to ya!

We normally stay up at Snowbird in our condo the week during the 24th of July. However, this year my aunt & uncle and their family wanted to have the condo. So instead we decided to just come for half a day- visit the Snowbird Center (which always involves getting ice-cream!) and do a small hike and of course some swimming.

Family shot on the bridge.

I scream, I scream, we all scream for ice-cream!

Hiking up the trail.

Gorgeous view down Little Cottonwood Canyon and over the valley.

Puzzle time- which always seems to go till past midnight...

...but here's the finished product! (It's a picture representing Lake Powell)

Snuggling watching a show the girls were crazy about- H2O. Super cute!

 My mom's side of the family usually does a sleepover from July 3rd - 4th. However, they switched it up this year and instead did a celebration for the 24th of July. It was originally going to be a sleepover, but turned into just a one day thing. Which worked out better for me since I was going through the temple the next day. It was fun to see everyone though, and some intense games of volleyball were played!

The kids loved playing on the tramp.

Our family sure loves volleyball. They play for hours on end- as long as the light will allow!

Kate was so cute with my grandma- she sat on her lap and talked with her for probably 20 minutes. Which is a big deal for a 5 year old. I know my grandma absolutely loved it. And isn't Kate's hair awesome??

And if you're noticing and wondering why there's more pictures of Kylie than of my other nieces- there's a reason for that. Her sisters were gone to Laura's having sleepovers with their cousins a lot. Or else their cousins were over here and her sisters were then off playing with them. For one reason or another- it just seemed like there were lots more picture opportunities with Kylie than with the others. However, the quantity of pictures has nothing to do with the quantity of love per child I promise. 

Not pictured:

-Late night talks with my Mom and Stacy (I'm talking till 2 am here)

-Movies including:

   *The Help

   *Everything You Want

   *Do Not Disturb (I LOVE Doris Day!!)

-Bridal Shower for my cousin, Katelyn

-The following conversation (which occurred repeatedly) between Kylie & Me:

        Me: Guess what Kylie?

        Kylie: What Jess?

        Me: I love you Kylie!

        Kylie: I love you Jess!

This week the O'Gwin's are up with Chris's family. They're coming back Friday night and on Saturday we're having family pictures done, and then heading down to Lake Powell for a week. Lake Powell will be a post in and of itself, so this is the end of the this MONSTROUS post. Hope you enjoyed it! It sure has been a fun couple of weeks! 

Only an Aunt

Only an Aunt can

Give Hugs like

a Mother,

Keep Secrets like

a Sister,

& Share Love like

a Friend.

I love being an aunt. How could I not with those adorable nieces and nephews? 
Thank you to my siblings for giving me the blessing of being a part of their children's lives. I truly love them with all my heart.

Jaden (10), Kylie (2), Lise (8), Kate (5), Camren (7), Aly (10), Makai (16 months) at Calvin's gravesite.

My Personal Anthem

If I were to chose an anthem for myself, this song, I Will by Hilary Weeks, would be it hands down. Here are the words if you care:

I made my choice.

You can mark this day,

the day I pledge 

to take His name.

I will be strong,

I will be brave.

Standing for Him

as I take my place.

I have felt the Spirit burn truth in my heart.

It's in my heart.

Chorus:

And I will stand 

I will not fall in a world that's weak

I will be strong.

I'll be true, I will choose His ways.

Yeah, I know what's right

and I will not change.

In a world where so many will not, I will.  <--- This is my favorite line. So powerful and EXACTLY how I feel!

I may be one,

but one becomes two

when you stand with me,

and I stand with you.

As we unite

our cause is great.

We're not just the candle, 

we are the flame.

And I will take the light He gives me,

and I'll hold it up high. I'll hold it up high.

Chorus 2x

My Testimony

I had the opportunity to share my testimony this past fast Sunday. I didn't take advantage of it and I've regretted that choice ever since. Didn't I fight for the chance to serve a mission so that I could share that very same testimony?! Yes I did. And I DO have a testimony. So why didn't I get up? Plain fear/shyness. No other way around it. Needless to say- it's not my proudest moment. I'll repent next fast Sunday I promise. However, this has led me to think a lot lately, if I had gotten up- what would I've shared? What will I share the next time the opportunity comes up?

I can't go back to that sacrament meeting and change my decision. But I can write out my testimony here and share it with whoever might stop on by. Here it goes:

I know that I have a Heavenly Father and Savior who knows me individually and loves me more than I can ever fully comprehend. Through various trials I've asked a lot of "why me?", "why do I have to experience this?"; and I've said a lot of "this is too hard" and "this is so unfair", etc. But I have never questioned that my Heavenly Father and Savior loved me. Not once. Of all the things in the gospel, that's one thing I know without a doubt to my core- God exists, and He loves and cares about me. 

I know that Jesus Christ is the Savior and Redeemer of the world and He provided an Atonement that is real and works. How I don't know, I just know it does. I know He understands perfectly how I feel, even when no one else does.

I know that Heavenly Father and the Savior have a plan for my life that is often drastically different than my own plans. (And maybe it's the same plan, just on an incredibly different timetable than I'd like.) And I know that accepting Their plan and letting go of my own can be really hard. And even painful sometimes. But I know that They know best, and if/when I follow Their plans- I'll be so much happier. Maybe I won't be happier tomorrow, next month, or year. But when it really counts- I'll be happier than I would've been if I'd followed my own wisdom. Basically, I know that trusting and following Heavenly Father and the Savior will never lead me astray. I might not fully understand along the journey, but that's where my faith comes in.

I know the Plan of Salvation is truly a plan of happiness and that by only following that plan, will I be guided to true happiness. I know that there is so much MORE than this short mortal experience I'm all currently in the middle of, and that the choices I make here have big consequences for the hereafter. That is- depending on how I apply the Atonement to my life.

I know that through the blessings of the priesthood, families can be together forever through the sealing power found in Temples. Death is not the end for me or my loved ones. I know that I will receive a perfected body in the hereafter. I cannot wait! I sometimes get giddy inside, I'm so excited just thinking about how wonderful that day will be.

I know that the Book of Mormon is true. It contains the word of God and was preserved for hundreds of years for our days to help lead and guide us through our earthly journey back to our Heavenly Father. I know prayer works. Heavenly Father really does listen to me when I talk with Him. With all the problems in the world, He loves me enough to listen to whatever I have to tell Him.

I know that revelation continues. I know that Joseph Smith was a true prophet called to bring in the Restoration. I also know that Thomas S. Monson is a true prophet today, who is indeed inspired and receives inspiration directly from the Lord on our behalf, along with the 12 Apostles.

I love this church with my whole heart. But more than that- I love, and have firm testimony in the Gospel contained within the church. I know that sounds picnicky- but it's an important distinction. (For more on that- please read this General Conference talk by Elder Hallstrom.) I KNOW this Gospel is true. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

St. George Getaway

So I haven't seen my best friend since February. This is simply unacceptable. So me and her FINALLY found a time that worked for both of us for me to come down and stay with her and her husband for a few days. It was so much fun and a much needed catch up! And bonus- her sister (Lanelle) was blessing her cute baby girl on Sunday, so I was also able to catch up with not only McKinzi but also her family. I love them! They're like a second family to me.

We did lots of fun things including:

-Tuacahn play, Hairspray. It was really good- I thoroughly enjoyed it a lot more than I thought I would. However- it was HOT!!! I felt so bad for McKinzi (she's pregnant) and also the actors who were singing and dancing in costumes in 90 + degree weather. 

-Watched lots of movies: Fast Five (from Redbox), People Like Us (movie theater)... it was alright. Language was not great, especially the F word from an 11 year old. Definitely could've done without that!, and Deja Vu. I know I know... but when it's 110 degrees outside, and only gets to around 95 degrees at night, you HAVE to stay inside. And movies are a great way to entertain yourselves for a few hours.

-I caught up on a couple Psych episodes I hadn't seen yet while they did various things.

-Went out to eat at Iceberg, Red Robin, and Sonic

-And mainly, we just hung out with each other. It was lots of fun.  

I'm so grateful they were willing to let me come crash with them for a while, I really did have tons of fun with both McKinzi and Tom. I love that girl like a sister, we've been through practically everything together since elementary school. I know we'll be in each others lives forever, because I honestly can't imagine (and refuse to let it happen) my life without her being a part of it in some way. This sounds super cheesy I know- but I really do feel that way. Love ya Kinz!!

Tuacahn Theater
I look horrible, but she looks cute! Check out the adorable baby bump!!

Tuacahn Theater
Tom & McKinzi. They're a cute couple, go very well together.

I found this picture on Facebook and HAD to include it here.  I honestly think this is possible in St. George because it really is that hot. It might take a little longer than in an oven- but it might seriously work. You can barely stand the heat just from the house to the car (and the car only cools down by the time you've reached your destination!). It just hits you like a wall the second you step outside. I think people are crazy for VOLUNTARILY living down there during the summer!! ;)

Happy 4th of July!

I had a wonderful 4th of July, and I hope all of you did as well. Spencer and Tiffany came over for an afternoon BBQ and played some games. After, we drove up to Park City to eat dinner before heading to the Oakley Rodeo. As luck would have it, we happened to choose the exact same restaurant (Baja Cantina) that Laura and her family- along with all of Mike's family- had also chosen to eat at. (Mike's family goes up to Park City every 4th of July and stays in condos for a couple of days. So normally, we don't see Laura at all on the 4th of July.) It was so much fun to unexpectedly see and talk with them for a little bit.

This was mine and Spencer's first time going to a rodeo, and so I really didn't know what to expect. It was a lot of fun seeing all the horses and watching crazy people willingly get on bucking animals. Sadly there were no fireworks afterward, but this was not surprising will all the fires across the state, and it was fairly windy anyways. All in all though, a really fun night and a memorable 4th of July!

I love the silly faces more than if everybody had been smiling. So much personality captured. My family is great. 

Proof my dad was actually there. (Photo credit: Tiffany)

The sunset was GORGEOUS!! So much so, it was distracting me from the rodeo! We sure are blessed to live on such a beautiful earth.  

Photo credit: Tiffany

Photo credit: Tiffany

I'd like to just take a moment to say how much I love this country, and I'm so grateful to be living in this magnificent land. We're truly so blessed to have all of the freedoms and privileges we enjoy living here. I'm so grateful to all the men and women who have sacrificed so much to give each of us those freedoms and privileges. God bless America!

The Decision

This is my people letting your people know my decision regarding the Church Service Mission (which will now be referred to as CSM).

Drumroll please..............

I decided to serve with LDS Family Services at the offices in Riverton.

I'm scared to death. I've never worked at an official job before. My whole life revolved around school until 7 months ago. I know the academic life. I'm successful at the academic life. Despite my extreme dislike of the academic life... I have no clue about the work life. I especially have no clue how successful I'll be at the work life. Don't misunderstand- I'm confident in my abilities to be successful, I just don't have any prior work experience to back the claim up! And heaven knows I'm praying and crossing all limbs that I'll enjoy- maybe even love, if I'm lucky- the work life. (I really really want to be spending my time doing something I actually enjoy, and not just do it because I'm supposed to, which is how it was during school.)

I understand that this is different. For one, I'm not getting paid, as I would be in a "real" job. However, I'll be working in an office as a secretary just as if I was getting paid. It's also different in that it's not full time; however, I'm not exactly sure what my hours will be at this point. I'm pretty open right now.

I never would've dreamed that this would be the "mission" I would serve. And I'll admit I had a hard time accepting that, and really letting go of the fact that I wouldn't be talking to people about the gospel. However, with the help of my wonderful mother, she helped me to see that no matter what capacity I served a mission in, that it is still important/valuable service. There is so much work to be done. And whether your knocking on doors in a different country, speaking a foreign language, or answering the phones and filing paperwork in an office- it is all part of the Lord's work and it is all important.

While I'm very nervous, I'm also really excited. Since I've never done anything like this before, there's lots for me to learn, and I'm sure I'll grow in so many different ways from this experience. I'm excited to work in a place where I know the Spirit will be and surrounded by people who share my same beliefs and values. I really missed that aspect while attending Westminster. It will also be an amazing opportunity for me to form great networks by getting to know people who are actually DOING counseling as their profession. And who knows, maybe at the end of my service mission, I'll be able to be hired on? You just never know where life will lead you next... I'm hoping this will lead me to a really great place not only now, but in the future.

So here's to a new experience! (And no, I don't know exactly when that experience will start.)

This is a picture (from online) of the building
where I'll be spending my time. 

Aloneness vs Loneliness

"Never mistake aloneness for loneliness.  In order to grow, you need time away, away from the noises of the world, friends, comfort, and all distractions to find what is important and fulfilling.  These alone moments build character and show the level of patience you are willing to endure to find the spirit and wrestle with thoughts that tell you you aren't worth anything or you can't do it right. 

When you are lonely, you are saying, 'I don't have much meaning in my life.  Someone come and make me happy.  I am unwilling to give because I am feeling sorry for myself.  You, world and all the people I know, are responsible for entertaining me and proving to me that I am worthwhile.' 

Change these moments of loneliness into ones of aloneness.  Alone, and all by yourself, do as the Savior taught you to do: serve.  This takes courage and sacrifice of your self-centeredness.  Endure being alone to find that you are loved and have love to give.  That decision made in your heart will bring a glow to you that will attract others to you.  You won't be lonely because you will have yourself, those you give to, and the Savior guiding you through."

I saved this quote a while ago after I read it on a blog I read (it's on my sidebar- "Dripping With Passion"). I was originally going to write up a whole post about my thoughts on this. However, now I think the quote speaks enough for itself. I'll just say this- I absolutely LOVE this!! It resonates with me and is something I struggle with and think about a lot actually. I hope I can have more moments of aloneness and less and less loneliness. Hope you enjoy and get something out of this as I did. 

*Note: I claim no photo credit, I found this picture online.*

Stickler Syndrome... with visuals to make it fun

Never heard of it before? Yeah- I'd drop to the floor in shock if you had. Not even doctors have heard it before. So what exactly is "Stickler Syndrome" anyways? Stickler Syndrome is caused by a mutation of specific genes. In my case, this mutation is an autosomal dominant pattern. This mutation can either be passed from a parent (my biological children have a 50% chance of inheriting Stickler's Syndrome). However, I did not inherit Stickler's because no one on any side of my family has ever had Stickler Syndrome. This means my Stickler's resulted from a new mutation on the genes.
     *Side note: I know that this didn't occur by chance, and I was meant to be in the body I have. I have a very firm testimony in the fact that it is Heavenly Father's will for my life. Why Heavenly Father chose Stickler Syndrome-and not Spina Bifida, or Multiple Sclerosis, or Dwarfism- I don't know. And frankly, I don't care cause it really doesn't matter.*

As with most things, Stickler's can affect individuals in a variety of ways to varying degrees.

Specifically in my case, it affects my skeletal system. It causes me to have extra large joints- resulting in me not being able to make a fist with my hands, kneel on my knees, etc. I also have a smaller rib cage. I have kyphosis, scoliosis, and lordosis- meaning any possible way my back can twist and curve... it does.

This picture isn't to show how cute Makai is
(although wasn't she ADORABLE?!)- but rather to show my hand.
See how large my knuckles are, and overall deformed the hand is???

Common with Stickler's is flat facial features, which I also have. The bones in my cheekbone and the bridge of my nose are apparently underdeveloped. I was also born with a cleft palate, very common with Stickler's.

Notice the flat facial features! I really do hate my nose.
It's so childish. Only kids have "button" noses.
So all you out there with "carrot" noses- be grateful!

I also have hearing loss, another common feature of Stickler's. Therefore require the use of hearing aids. And because of this- I also have the very useful ability to read people's lips!!

My actual right hearing aid.

Another common feature with Stickler's are eye abnormalities. Possibilities include: severe nearsightedness, glaucoma, cataracts, and retinal detachment. In some cases this can cause blindness. Thankfully I have had no problems with my eye sight so far. I don't even wear contacts! YAY!!!

Here's a website to check out if you're interested. I found it to be very helpful and informative. Even I learned new things about Stickler's!! http://ghr.nlm.nih.gov/condition/stickler-syndrome 

Now there's a few things in my life that are not necessarily related to Stickler's. I'm extremely short (only 3 feet, 7 inches tall). I used to take growth hormone shots everyday when I was younger. A lot of good that did... (sarcasm).

Also the fact that I use a walker, wheelchair, and sometimes a scooter is completely unrelated to Stickler Syndrome. At the age of 4 I went in to have surgery on both my hips to help me walk better (they went in, cut both hip bones, rotated the bones and then put screws and plates in). However, unfortunately during that operation I became paralyzed from the chest down. What happened was that unbeknownst to everyone my back muscles were rigidly supporting my spine. When they gave me the epidural after the anesthesia, my muscles could no longer support the spine. It relaxed, and my spine was pinched causing paralysis. Through a miracle I have regained partial feeling and movement back. But I still require the use of a walker for short distances, and either a wheelchair/scooter for long distances.

Wow, this is long. Hope it wasn't too boring for you to read! If you have questions- feel free to ask!! :)

For information about LDS Disability Resources, click here!

Q & A

I received the following comment on my post, Reflections on Laura's Back Surgery, and thought I'd take a moment to answer.

Question that is none of my business that you don't have to answer: Is this a genetic defect or what surgeries have you all had to have?

My mom and sister (and brother, but he hasn't had any surgeries... yet) have what's called Degenerative Back Disease (actually upon googling, I've discovered it's actually called Degenerative Disc Disease). This is genetic, which causes the discs in your back to become weaker and break down. They get smaller and smaller- compressing, causing herniated discs which press on the nerves. It's very painful. ---and that whole paragraph was contributed from my mom. Thanks mom!


My mom had back surgery 23 years ago in which they went in and reamed out the space where the nerves goes down to the hips on both sides. She also had a herniated disc, which they took care of (how we're not sure).  


Laura has actually had 2 back surgeries now. The first back surgery, which was about 5 years ago, she had a herniated disc and they went in and shaved off that disc so it wouldn't be pushing on the nerves. However, 6 months later after that surgery, she re-herniated the disc as she was trying to pick up one of her kids at Lake Powell. This second and most recent (and hopefully last!) surgery they went in took out the herniated disc and replaced it with a rod. The bone above and below that rod now need to fuse together with the rod.


Now for me. I'm not sure whether or not I actually have Degenerative Disc Disease, and honestly it probably really doesn't matter if I do or not. See, I have two rods that go the entire length of my back. So my back can't move/change a whole lot even if it wanted/tried. My first back surgery was when I was about 5-6 years old. My spine was curving so they went in and put a rod in the top half of my back. The second surgery was when I was 13 years old. My spine was still continuing to curve, and eventually would've gotten to the point of crushing internal organs. So... back in they went and this time they put in another rod, from the very top to the very bottom. I have a nice scar to show for it. (Actually have quite a few scars...) 


Hmmm... talking about this has made me decide to do a post about what disorder I actually do have.